The Downside of Not Doing the Things You're Supposed to Do When You're Supposed to Do Them

Big day today. Why? Today... or tonight, more specifically... marks the first time I'm posting in here in 28 days. 4 weeks. AWFUL.

So awful, in fact, that I'm using that embarrassing realization--along with the chagrin-based motivation I've developed thanks to the constant reminders to post from a certain Katelyn Larkin the past few weeks--to get myself to finally write in here again. So thanks for your persistent and perpetual prodding. It is appreciated.

The title of this post indicates the "downside" of not doing what you're supposed to do when you're supposed to do it, and I can tell you that there have definitely been downsides to going without blogging for 4 weeks.

First downside? Well, it's taken FOREVER to write what little I've already written. It's like my mind has forgotten how to think about these things, like I've lost my ability to reflect on life.

On top of the fact that it's been 4 weeks since I last blogged, it's been 1 full week since I last exercised. Now, for some of you I'm sure that doesn't mean much, but for me, going even two or three days without running can throw me into a funk. So a full week without exercise is just an unequivocally bad thing.

So what's the big deal with a slightly-emptier-than-it-might-have-been blog and a pair of slightly-less-in-shape-than-they-might-have-been legs? Well, two things:

1. As hinted at, when I don't do something for a while, it makes me worse at it. It's kind of a "use it or lose it" type of situation. I don't use my brain to reflect, and my brain becomes much less able to reflect the next time I try to use it to do that a month later. I don't run and the next time I run I feel less nimble and agile. Don't remind me that tomorrow morning I'm getting up at 5am to run my 12 mile long run for the week. I'm trusting my legs haven't atrophied that much in a week.

2. I briefly mentioned when talking about how I haven't run in a week that I fall into a funk when I don't run for as little as two or three days. While potentially a seemingly extravagant statement, I've actually found it to be pretty true. This probably isn't the way that it's supposed to be, but I feel anxious and stressed and easily frustrated and flustered when I don't run for several days. Additionally, I'm much less socially and interpersonally adept and less able to navigate the intricacies of conversational structure when engaging with other people. I don't know why that last sentence was written in such a fancy way, but maybe it's because my mind is starting to come back. Regardless, what I mean to say is simply that I'm not as good at interacting with others when I don't run. I'm less friendly. I'm less confident. I'm less relaxed and at ease. All of which add up to a less-than-ideal Chris.

So after writing all of this, the logical question to ask would be: why don't you just do it then? Why didn't I run for a week? Why haven't I blogged in almost a month?

Simply enough, it's because I didn't prioritize them.

I've discovered that at the end of a long day of sitting in front of my computer at work, I'm not exactly interested in spending an hour in front of my computer at home typing up a blog post.

When my alarm wakes me up at 5am so I can run, I sometimes find myself--not surprisingly--more interested in getting a few extra hours of shut eye than in putting in a few miles in my running shoes. It doesn't make it any more enticing that during this time of year, 5am tends to be very dark, and very cold.

And while the only examples I've used have been blogging and running, there are countless other examples that I want to do but don't and am not better off as a result. Reading the fifteen books I've started and never finished? Catching up with the many friends I have fallen out of touch with? Learning something interesting and new? Exploring any one of several unfamiliar places in Baltimore? The list goes on.

These are things that I'd like to do, but I just "don't have the time." Well, truth of the matter is, I ALWAYS have the time, I just don't prioritize that time in such a way that what ends up getting done is what I wanted to use the time for in the first place. And my attempt at prioritization tends to manifest in making a schedule, but a schedule isn't any good when you don't follow it. And my problem is that I am much more enticed by the appeal of each moment than I am committed to being loyal to my meticulously-crafted calendar.

At this point, this post is getting long, and because of my out-of-practice brain, it has been quite the agonizing journey for me just making it this far. So rather than delving into an analysis of how I can solve my problem of uncontrollable spontaneity with a healthy dose of organization, I'm going to cut it short and begin blogging about a topic I am more interested in blogging about.

Before I move on, however, I want to reference this book I read a few years ago, called The Power of Full Engagement. Here's a quick Amazon link for those interested:

http://www.amazon.com/Power-Full-Engagement-Managing-Performance/dp/0743226755/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1323822276&sr=8-1

The book posits that it's important to have structure in your life... that it's to build routine and rituals into your lifestyle. I completely agree. Think of how it becomes easier to wake up early when you practice going to bed at 9:30pm every night. While yes, it's going to be hard to fall asleep the first time, after a while you get used to it, and it becomes easier. Same thing with eating 3 meals a day. Who says you're supposed to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner? Well, we're used to eating "3 square meals a day" so we do. Now it's routine... our day is built around those meals (I have an hour blocked off every day from noon to 1 pm for lunch).

So maybe the solution, which I'm realizing I said that I wouldn't get into three paragraphs ago, is simply to build more routine into my life. To make a point of getting up in the morning and then meditating before I do anything else. To block off half an hour before my projected sleep time and make myself read at that point. It's hard to start, but if I can manage to start, it will become easier with time. And since my projected sleep time tonight is 9pm, I guess the fact that it's 8:30pm means I better end this post and get reading!

Taking Time to Write a Trivial Blog Post Instead of Taking Time to Write a Momentous Inspirational Speech

A few weeks ago, I was asked to give the alumnus talk at the annual communion breakfast for seniors at my old high school, Devon Prep. What an honor, right? Definitely. I couldn't have been more flattered. But unfortunately now that the date is looming dangerously near (it's this Sunday, November 20), that honor is now also doubling as an unappreciated source of stress. Understandably.

So why am I writing this blog post instead of working on a speech that definitely needs to be written? Great question. And I think the answer is that I need to have a direction before I can really make any progress writing it. Which, in the spirit of Exploring Life, is definitely an expandable topic to life in general. The fact that I need to have direction before I can really delve into my hopefully-inspirational SPEECH really is a reflection of the fact that I need to have direction before I can really delve into my hopefully-fulfilling LIFE.

And this is exactly what I can write about, and it is exactly why I am instead writing this blog post.

But I'm not done. Let's think about this a little longer, before I go run off and start working on this speech. I think I owe this blog a little love since it's been underappreciated for what, almost 2 weeks? I feel like this happened last time. In fact, if you read the first line of that last post, you'll discover that in fact, it did. Seems like 13 days is the magic number when it comes to the amount of time between Chris' few-and-far-between blog posts.

What would Chris write about? Well, considering that finding fulfillment, seeking life satisfaction and pursuing my passions seems to be a recurring theme in my life (hey, it's pretty much what my current job entails), why don't I write about that? I mean, hey, it's something most people, if not everyone, can relate to, and I think it would be very fitting for Devon Prep seniors about to graduate and go over to different colleges in the pursuit of a successful life.

Speaking of living a successful life, perhaps that warrants definition of what a "successful life" actually is. There's no shortage of definitions of success in our society--being successful means being rich, it means being attractive, it means being popular, it means being respected.

I am by no means qualified to tell anyone what being successful actually means. In fact, NO ONE is qualified to tell you that. That's something each one of us has a responsibility to determine--and choose--for ourselves.

But how many of us actually consciously make that choice? How many of us actually spend any significant amount of time thinking about what "success" really looks like to us? I would argue most of us spend more time thinking about how we're going to achieve that success... much more time, anyway, than we spend thinking about the success we're actually trying to achieve.

I want to caution anyone reading this, however, from thinking that success is something easily and quickly defined. While yes, the last few things I've asserted imply that pursuing power and money and fame and wealth etc etc is far from a noble cause, I want to stress that you shouldn't automatically write them off. Nor should you automatically write them in. The point is that you should think about it. Critically. How many of us spend our lives in pursuit of success that others have defined for us? I don't want to spend my life that way, but that's just me.

Bringing it back to the idea of needing direction. I think we all need direction, it's just that for many of us, that direction is automatically set for us. We aren't the pilots in our planes; we're the engines. We're working to get towards our destination, wherever or whatever that may be. But I think it's important to give some serious thought about that direction, lest you commit your life to get somewhere only to discover that it wasn't really where you actually wanted to get in the first place.

There's a book in my office titled, "If you don't know where you're going, you'll probably end up somewhere else." Or something like that. I love the title, but the title's all I have to go off of as I haven't yet found the time to delve into reading the actual book.

There's another book in my office (actually I think it's in my bag) titled, "What Should I Do With My Life?" What a great question. And one that everyone has had answer at some point or another. Please notice that the title isn't "What Do I Want to Do With My Life" but rather "What Should I Do With My Life." I think (and the author asserts) that it is an important distinction, because life isn't all about what YOU want. It's about many things, your desires among them. Life is also about the needs of the world. It's also about what you are good at. And that is the basic premise of the retreat that I run at Loyola. Your vocation lies at the intersection of your brightest joys, your greatest gifts and the world's deep hunger.

Anywho, I think I'm getting a little off topic. That's a little spiel about RoadTrip (the retreat I run), but really this blog isn't about RoadTrip. It's somewhat about vocational discernment (the Jesuits' name of figuring out what you are being called to do and how you are being called to live).

This post is really about direction. Actually--okay--it's really about the hopefully-inspirational speech I really should be writing instead. The speech whose theme I am thinking will be direction.

Unfortunately, looking at the time, I don't believe I'll be able to really delve into that speech tonight. Because it's already past 9am, I'm still at the Barnes and Noble in Towson, have to pack up and get back to my car in the parking lot outside, drive 20 minutes back to my house, get ready for bed, get a decent night's sleep and hopefully wake up at 5am to run around downtown Baltimore with the Back on My Feet crew at Christopher's Place. And then go to the FAC and run whatever else I need to run to make my total mileage tomorrow morning at least 8 miles.

So I guess I'll continue this at a later date...

Or maybe I'll just work on that speech.

Weekly Challenge: Get At Least 8 Hours of Sleep Each Night

Can you believe it...

It's almost been two weeks since I wrote anything on here! You see, this always happens when I blog, and it's precisely why when I first made this blog, I added the caveat that I will post only when I feel like it. Because there invariably are times when I go almost a full two weeks--or two months--without even signing in. Terrible. But admitting it will happen helps me to feel a little less guilty. To some extent.

Anywho, part of the reason I haven't posted in a while is because last week, I adhered to a new regimen--I challenged myself to get at least 8 hours of sleep every night. I discovered that it actually was quite a challenge, and I had to make sacrifices in other parts of my life in order to accommodate this new lifestyle change. I couldn't stay up as late, I rarely used an alarm, and I did NOT make it to the gym in the morning as often. Actually, I don't think I made it to the gym in the morning AT ALL last week!

In the past, I held firm to the convenient belief that I functioned optimally if I got exactly 6.5 hours of sleep each night. Then, after a week or so, I would treat myself to a thoroughly satisfying sleep binge. This conviction was further reinforced by the fact that whenever I got more than 8 hours of sleep, I awoke feeling groggy and lethargic. So why would I waste time sleeping when it could be spent doing other things... especially since that extra sleep seemed to make me LESS lively?

Most people know that studies advocating the importance of 8 hours of sleep a night are quite the ubiquity, and after this past week, I am totally sold. Not only did I sleep more soundly than I've slept in a while, but I awoke feeling invigorated and alert. And as an unexpected but welcome side effect, I dreamt every single night. And I never dream!

Really makes me wonder if there is a correlation between length of sleep and dream vividness, because my sister would hibernate for what seemed like 14 hours a night (and sometimes it didn't seem like 14 hours... it WAS 14 hours) and then would proceed to spend the next hour and a half recounting to the rest of our family every minute detail of the complex and elaborate dream she just had. So, I think I will label this discovery a veritable revelation.

As I mentioned earlier (and in the title of this post), my challenge was to get at least 8 hours of sleep each night. This is part of this new thing I'm doing which for lack of a better, more creative term, I'll call a "Weekly Challenge." Basically, it entails doing something new or trying a new lifestyle for a week. The week before last was when I delved into pescetarianism. Last week was getting 8 hours of sleep a night. This week? Well, I guess I'll consider this week a hiatus week, primarily because I simply forgot to commit to a new challenge. Oops!

The idea of the Weekly Challenge is inspired by a number of sources, including the following two TED talks:

Try Something New for 30 Days

Weekday Vegetarian

The Weekly Challenge concept is pretty awesome because it allows me to live differently with relative impunity. The weekly pescetarian thing? Like Graham Hill says in the latter of the two above TED talks... the concept of my last hamburger is just too daunting a prospect to be even remotely appealing. So I get to "try on" pescetarianism for a week, and if you read the post two posts ago, you know that I really enjoyed it. Ended up having some of the best tofu I've ever had! And actually, at dinner tonight my pescetarian tendencies resulted in an absolutely delicious potato burger thingamajig. I honestly just don't remember what was in it and I definitely don't remember what it was called, but it was just amazing. And, consequently, probably more nutritious than the beef burger I would have normally ordered.

Yes, I know, it's a pretty pedestrian way of determining the relative nutrition value of different menu items, but in the absence of any real nutritional understanding, I adhere to the following formula:

red meat < poultry < fish < vegetables

Hey, it's a start, right?

So the Weekly Challenge is something that I've completed successfully twice at this point, and I look forward to many more Weekly Challenges in the weeks to come. Some ideas I've brainstormed include:

- drink at least 64 oz of water a day

- don't buy anything new

- actually manage to adhere to my schedule

- don't eat out (might not be possible, actually)

- journal every evening

- write a thank you card each day

- say hi to strangers

- call up a friend to catch up everyday

- be early for everything

- exercise every day

- speak negatively, never

- meditate every morning

- eat according to the food pyramid

- try one new thing everyday

So excited. The Weekly Challenge gives me the motivation and accountability to sample a new lifestyle each week... tell me that isn't such a perfect ambition for someone who keeps a blog called "Go Explore Life."

The Vibram Fivefingers, Image, and Authenticity

I'm a big fan of running, and recently (relatively) I purchased a $100 pair of Vibram Fivefingers. Quite pricey (or "spendy" if you're from the Pacific Northwest). Here's the thing: as much as I love running, I love it even MORE in the Vibram Fivefingers. If you're not familiar, here's a link:

http://www.rei.com/product/811202/vibram-fivefingers-komodosport-multisport-shoes-mens

Those are exactly the ones I have. I don't recall them being $110 when I bought mine at REI, but no matter.

So why do I like my Vibram Fivefingers? Here's the gist of it:

The Vibrams simulate barefoot running, which forces you to land on your forefoot when you run, rather than your heel. While for many people it might initially feel unnatural, it's actually more biomechanically efficient. Landing on your forefoot utilizes your joints for a springier running experience, which consequently absorbs more of the physical impact of running. Basically, it's the way we as a species evolved to run... or so the theory goes. Additionally, the most biomechanically efficient running cadence is 180 steps per minute, and running in "minimalist" footwear makes you take shorter, faster strides. This gets your cadence much closer to the 180 steps per minute that most people are WELL below when they run.

If you made it through that last relatively technical paragraph, I want you to know that the biomechanical efficiency of it all isn't the primary reason I am all about these shoes, however. I really just ENJOY running a lot more in them.

Tonight I ran 4 miles in them at Loyola's Fitness and Aquatic Center (FAC). Invariably, the weird shoes draw perturbed stares from many fashion-conscious strangers, but as long as you have the emotional fortitude and self-confidence to pull them off, they are fantastic. I lapped everybody on the 1/10 mile track. Granted, there were only 2 other people... but that's irrelevant to the fact that these shoes rock.

So I think the essence of what I want to talk about here, going along with the theme of exploring life, isn't so much what I did today or what I was wearing while doing it. It's really more about WHY I enjoy these shoes. The fact that they are weird--and the fact that as the wearer I typically inherit that impression--doesn't at all prevent me from running in them. I really love running in them. I think the fact I wear these shoes also says a lot about me. Bear with me here...

We all do different things for different reasons. Someone might wear these weird looking shoes because they are into the latest trends. In fact, when I was in Los Angeles over Spring Break I was on Venice Beach and saw a woman running in them. But she was running in them totally wrong. She was heel striking, and landing heel first in these shoes is even WORSE than doing it in regular running shoes, because these have so little cushioning on these. What I deduced from that observation was that she was wearing them because they represented the newest trend in running--which they did and still do--and she delved into that trend without actually educating herself first. She wore them not because the style of running they are conducive to is more biomechanically efficient but because they were cool.

Okay, you might be reading this and be thinking, "Chris, that's a lot of assumptions to be making about a stranger you saw for a full 8 seconds," but given the details I just shared and the fact that this was taking place on Venice Beach in Los Angeles, I think my assumptions are sufficiently justified. We'll never know, and that's really not the point of what I'm trying to make, anyway.

The point I'm trying to make--after I point out right now that as evidenced by the previous two paragraphs I can very easily fall into unnecessarily intellectual tirades--is that I would never wear these shoes for that reason. I think that reason is entirely, purely, COMPLETELY about IMAGE, and I am NOT an image type of person. I would consider myself a SUBSTANCE type of person. This is what I think my reason for wearing the Vibrams says about me.

I don't wear these to look trendy. I don't wear these to look cool. I don't wear these to look fast. I DEFINITELY don't wear these to look stylish.

Those reasons are all about image.

I wear these because they increase my enjoyment of something I already enjoy. It's about the experience. It's about substance.

So, are you about IMAGE? Or are you about SUBSTANCE?

If I had asked myself that question a few years ago, I think I would have told you I was all about substance. I mean, who wouldn't? But the real answer was that I was all about image. I was all about what others thought of me. Being liked, making a positive impression, gaining approval--these were things that were at the forefront of my decision-making process each day. And who can blame me? Everyone wants to be liked, and everyone wants to be right. The approval of others makes you feel both of those.

But when I ask myself that question now--and I am confronted with that decision every day, all day--I can honestly say that it is substance that appeals to me, not image. I value integrity. I value authenticity. Image for me represents that mask we all wear when we want to look good. Image is cool. But substance is so much more than being cool. It's about being true. True to yourself. Extremely cliche, I know, but it's cliche for a reason. Substance represents authenticity and integrity. And that is what I am all about.

Wow, who would have thought a post about shoes would transform into a post about integrity. Not me when I started writing it, that's for sure!

My Weekday Pescetarianism

There's this new thing I started this week. I call it, "weekday pescetarianism." And it was inspired by this TED talk:

http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/graham_hill_weekday_vegetarian.html

I'd encourage you to click the link above and watch that if you have 4 minutes and 4 seconds to spare. It's good.

Anywho, so what is weekday pescetarianism? Basically, the premise is that during the work week, I abide by a pescetarian diet, and then on weekends I eat whatever I want. So I reap the health benefits of pescetarianism while still getting to enjoy a juicy turkey burger or chicken burrito on the weekend. The prospect of eating my LAST hamburger was just not an appealing thought.

If by this point you've made it this far into the blog post and still don't know what "pescetarian" means, I'm guessing you aren't planning on looking it up... and since knowing what it means is pretty integral to making any sense out of this post, I'll just tell you. A pescetarian diet is basically vegetarian, but you can eat seafood. It's a portmanteau of the words "pesce" (Italian for "fish") and "vegetarian." Hence, "pescetarian."

So on Monday I started my weekday pescetarianism. There have been two or three times throughout the week so far when I've had to consciously choose NOT to eat meat. Monday I ate at Thai One On in Towson, and instead of getting my usual Chicken Pad Thai, Chicken Panang Curry, or Chicken Mussaman Curry, I took a risk and ordered what turned out the be the most delicious TOFU Drunken Noodle dish ever. Simply fantastic. Then today I ate at Boulder (a dining area on Loyola's campus) and ordered a veggie burger which turned out to be just downright amazing. Who knew? Both tofu and veggie burgers have been hit or miss for me in the past but my thoroughly positive experiences with them this week are leading me to rethink my opinion of them.

I figure there are probably lots of benefits to a pescetarian diet over a meat diet, but honestly, I haven't done enough research to spout facts to you. A quick Google of "pescetarian diet benefits" yields this as the top result though:

http://www.pescetarianlife.com

I'm sure they have lots of great information on there, and I will put it in my "Reading List" folder in my bookmarks to be read at a future time. Feel free to read that though, if you feel so inclined and happen to be more curious than I am at the moment about the health benefits of a pescetarian diet.

Why am I not particularly interested in the health benefits? Don't get me wrong, I AM interested in the health benefits... I wouldn't do it if I didn't feel it would be beneficial. But really, for me the appeal of trying weekday pescetarianism isn't so much the health benefits, but the NEWNESS of the experience. This blog is about "exploring life," and that's what weekday pescetarianism is all about for me. It's new. And I'm trying it on. I'm exploring that experience, in a way. And I anticipate exploring many more things in the future. That's how I learn about life.

So weekday pescetarianism for me is a new thing, and we'll see how long it lasts. At the very least, it will last until I've tried it on long enough to decide it's not the thing for me. So far so good, and I'll let you know how it goes. In the meantime, give some thought to one of my favorite icebreaker questions:

When's the last time you did something for the first time?

The Inaugural Post

The first sentence of a blog you're hoping to keep for a long time is always such a momentous thing.

And so now that that's all said and done, let's get started. ;-)

SO. Why another blog? I already have more than I can keep track of! Well, as with many blogs, the creation of this blog coincides (somewhat) with a transition in my life... and as such, I decided to start this blog because I am starting a new part of my life.

A little over a month ago, I got my first full-time, 9-to-5 job. And since then, I've been working that job. Thus begins the rest of my life. I'm done college, I'm done grad school, I'm done adventuring with AmeriCorps... now it's time to settle down and start being an adult.

Haha okay I am going to be perfectly honest and say that while that is at least part of my motivation for starting this blog, I have absolutely no intention of living a life that is as BORING or as MONOTONOUS as that previous paragraph led me (and probably you) to believe. Please. I don't currently live that way, and I don't intend to EVER live that way. Life is so much more than that. It's a constant adventure, and I am looking to keep it that way.

The title of this blog, "Go Explore Life," really captures a lot of what I am hoping this blog will convey. I want this blog to chronicle my life after the "exciting" times in AmeriCorps, Colorado, college, etc. This blog will chronicle my newly-normal life. Yeah, kind of weird, but given the fact I've spent the past seven years experiencing the excitement of college, the mountain high of Colorado, and the adventures of service in AmeriCorps, working a 9-to-5 job in Baltimore is really the most ordinary thing I've done in quite a while.

Now, I want to stress that while this blog is going to be an "everyday" blog for me, everyday does not mean boring. The way I see it, I fully and completely intend to make life as exciting and incredible as possible. And that means that this everyday blog is going to be a blog of every awesome, incredible, sensational day of my life... at least, until I don't feel like blogging about it anymore.

Let's get this adventure started!!